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Alarm screams. I ignore it. I check my DMs (yes, those DMs). 437 unread messages—half are love confessions, the other half are asking if I’m a hologram. I’m not. I’m just hungry. First priority: pink pancakes with edible glitter. Calories don’t count if you eat them in a Sailor Moon nightgown. 🥞✨ I spend an hour making fake blood out